America! America?

As I ponder the title of Martha Stuart’s magazine, I find it quite ironic. Simplicity is something we rarely encounter these days. Maybe that is why we need a magazine like this in the first place. Instead of skipping towards my favorite section: “Five Easy Dinners,” I flip through the pages and investigate the things that the writers are trying to make simpler for us. Among the colorful pages adorned with advertisements, I find articles entitled, “How to Save Smarter.” and “How to Stop Procrastinating.” And while these topics can be useful, I notice that they are written in response to a future oriented accomplishment: saving for the future and postponing tasks for the future. It can only indicate that we rarely do anything to dedicate ourselves to the present moment which, in reality, is all we have. As I spend the weekend with my cousins at their beach house, I can’t decide if the maintenance of a vacation home out weighs the supposed relaxation benefits. When my cousin commented that he wanted to trade his home in for something a little bigger and closer to the water, I couldn’t help but think to myself, Well, that is sure not a way to save smarter... And then I ask myself, what about the house you already have? Can you take a moment to enjoy the blessing of even having a vacation home in the first place? The fact that we and, I include myself in this, always want more, explains the reason we need articles in this particular vain. So we are conflicted. Because on the one hand we want so badly to achieve The American Dream... Homes, cars, clothes, money, but on the other hand we are killing ourselves to get it. I am not condemning my cousin or anyone for that matter. It is really more of a compassionate curiosity of why “the next thing” always matters more than “this thing, here, now.” I am also not scoffing at luxurious homes and gorgeous clothes but as I am in the midst of my formative years, I believe I must question the values of those who came before me. I must ask what really matters the most and is the American Dream really just that... A dream?

The same thing goes for food. We are so quick to turn to process meats, bread, and substitutes for the real thing, i.e. Splenda and Smart Balance (quite an ironic name, huh?). Is a tablespoon of sugar in our coffee and a pat of butter on our toast really going to kill us? Give us heart disease or Diabetes? Coming from a mother and grandmother who have never used the substitute but have always eaten in moderation, I am going to say no. We no longer eat to sustain ourselves but rather we want to be as thin as possible as quick as possible. I am happy to say, I do not include myself in this category any more but as a woman with a former “weight problem,” I know what it is like to dream of being thin and the “life it promises.” I have also found that thinness really doesn’t promise anything lasting or deep. The failure of this promise had led to a miraculous discovery of a self worth that goes deeper than any amount of weight loss. So I ask you and myself daily... what do you really, really want? As John Tarrant once said, “All wanting--for love, to be seen for who we are, for a new red car (or beach house or Rolex, or to lose 10 pounds)--is wanting to find and be taken into the mysterious depth of things.” I am sorry to say that the depth we seek cannot be grabbed with bare hands, cannot be taken and hidden or locked up or saved or lost. It can only be experienced and felt. But isn’t that so much better?